Darkness and lIght day 2

Today is a day I feel the darkness creeping back in. For the first time in weeks the flash of steel enters my mind and I am struggling not to take it out of the block. So far I have not done so, but it keeps screaming my name.
i am typing this as an effort to push the all too dangerous thought from my mind and later I will take a nice  walk to soothe me.
Nothing in particular has brought this on, only to say that living in a basement apartment with a screaming two year old and my 10 year old having a meltdown(common for his condition but difficult nonetheless)
I want to share today, want to tell you all more about what is going on inside my head but I do not know myself yet, there is just too much going on.
Today is the darkness
Hopefully tomorrow will be the light.

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